This post is from our friend Andrea Jenkins. When I read this I was compelled to share it. It is powerful testimony of her transparent transformation. So often as women we do not see or know the value God has placed on our lives and it shows up in our relationships. If you are struggling with your worth or how you allow others to determine it this will bless you.
...OK going to share a TRANSPARENT MOMENT; but a moment with a purpose in mind...
I have dated and have been married in the past, but to date I have never been taken on a date, treated to dinner, had my birthday celebrated by the person in my life, had a Valentine's Day, had a Christmas, never experienced those nice things that gentleman do when in relationships.
I have gone all out, spent money, did things "just because" but I don't know what that means in the reverse.
Now by NO MEANS do I blame that on my ex-spouse or on past relationships, the blame stops with myself, why you ask? ..... Because back then I didn't know something that I ABSOLUTELY know now ......
I know my worth, I know my value!! I know that while I may not be perfect, I am worth being given the things that I give out. I don't specifically mean "things" but it is an attitude, I am worth the same giving spirit in someone as what I have and give.
Sometimes we get so beat down by hurt that we don't fully grasp who we are, we don't see ourselves as the jewels we are. When you have a precious piece of jewelry you don't treat it like you would costume jewelry, you treat it different because it's value is higher. So NOW I treat myself as the "sapphire" (I like sapphires) I am rather then just a blue painted rock!!
I hear the statement often that you can't expect someone to treat you with value if you don't treat yourself as something of value....such a true statement! I was NEVER a person who passed myself around, but I WAS a person who accepted any old thing, (notice I said WAS). If I wasn't treated like I wanted, I hung in there thinking things would change if I continued being the sweet woman I was, however how many know that sometimes you have to demand change and not just look for it to happen!!
God did a transformation in me so that while waiting is hard, I can't allow myself to be on the "marked down/clearance rack" by settling for less then not only what I deserve, but what I am willing to give.
I believe in giving nothing less then 100% in relationships, friends and otherwise, anything less then my best does not sit right with me. I have turned down request because I didn't feel I could give my best. So if I am committed to giving someone my best, and treating someone as the priceless gem they are.....then why accept less for myself!! I am soooooo very thankful for the transformation God did in my life .... for allowing me to see myself as He sees me.